Heidi Bond was desperate. No matter how much she cajoled or threatened her daughter, the 9-year-old refused to finish their workout.

Used to this struggle, Bond pushed harder, encouraging Breanna to complete the four-mile loop. She had already lost weight, Bond reminded her. She couldn't give up now, or her hard work would be for nothing.

Breanna ignored her mother and turned for home.

Watching the 173-pound girl walk away, Bond's heart sank. She realized this was a fight she wasn't going to win in a war she couldn't afford to lose.

Reality check

As reports of the childhood obesity epidemic hit home, parents around the country are struggling to figure out how to help their kids lose weight.

About 12.5 million children 2 to 19 are obese, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. That extra weight can lead to serious health problems, including type 2 diabetes, cardiovascular disease and psychosocial issues such as peer discrimination or poor self-esteem.

"Parents are in a really tough position," says Dr. Elissa Jelalian, a staff psychologist at the Weight Control and Diabetes Research Center who focuses on the development of intervention programs for children. "They feel they are not doing a good job as parents if their child is struggling with weight. ... Parents see the potential health consequences, but kids aren't in tune with that."

Bond understands that frustration well. As a baby, she says, Breanna had a hearty appetite, and her parents joked that she would grow up to be like her dad -- a 6-foot, 200-pound man.

By the time she was a year old, Breanna weighed close to 25 pounds. Bond asked their pediatrician whether she should be concerned, but he assured her Breanna would grow into the weight.

Over the next few years, Breanna packed on the pounds. In preschool, she was bigger than any of the other kids in her class.

Her parents hired a nutritionist, but the healthy habits didn't stick. They brought their daughter to a psychologist and an endocrinologist; both said Breanna's test results were normal. Breanna joined a dance class and a swim team, but her weight continued to climb.

"Kids teased me," Breanna says. "They called me chubby and fatty-o."

"It was horrible for me and my husband," Bond remembers. "We felt helpless. We honestly didn't know what to do."

Their family was not one for a lot of fast food, soda or sugary treats. Bond cooked dinner most nights: fried chicken, roast beef, enchiladas. But the large meals, combined with a lack of physical activity and the junk food Breanna ate at school, continued to create a big problem.

"Imagine going through life and carrying around seven sacks of potatoes," Bond says. "That's what it's like for these overweight children. It's taxing on their hearts, organs. It's hurting them tremendously. And society isn't helping."

At 9, Breanna weighed 186 pounds.

Red light, green light

Conversations about a child's weight can be fraught with psychological landmines, says Dr. Denise Wilfley, director of the Weight Management & Eating Disorders Program at Washington University School of Medicine.

"Mainly what we suggest is actually having the whole family take on a healthier lifestyle -- for everybody to eat as well as possible, as nutritiously as possible, so the overweight child is not singled out," she says.