How to Find a Valentine on Tinder, According to This 83-Year-Old Grandma
If you’re hopelessly looking for Mr. or Mrs. Right on dating apps, look no further. Grandma Hattie may be 83 years old, but she’s got the best tips for navigating Tinder.
“It’s like shopping at a good store,” Hattie, who recently appeared in an episode of WE tv's "Extreme Love," told InsideEdition.com. “There’s a lot of things to buy here and I don’t even have to pay for them.”
Hattie, who has been branded a cougar but makes the other mature ladies look tame in comparison, says she first got on Tinder to meet new men. “And I do love to meet a lot of men,” she said.
While she first thought the app was solely for people looking for hook-ups, she quickly learned she could find whatever she was seeking, thanks to a few simple tips:
“If you’re really interested in finding a life mate, put ‘I love men and I want to get married" in your profile, Hattie says. “If you're not very clear about what you want, you're not going to get what you want. You're creating it. You're putting it out into the ethers and then the universe knows what to give you back because you're very clear about it.”
Listen to Your Heart
Instead of spending time analyzing a profile or deciding if he’s the one, “just swipe right,” Hattie recommends.
“Generally you just trust your instinct because it's like if you ask a whole bunch of questions, everybody thinks they're interesting and fun and sexy and all that,” she continued. “If it hits you right, just say I'm going to give it a try.”
Set Up a Time to Meet as Soon as Possible
“Give them your phone number immediately,” Hattie says. “People get into texting. It's like fake dates, fake love, fake people. No. I used to watch ‘Catfish’ and then people would write each other in love for a year. They never met. So what you want to do is let it be known that you want to meet. Talk first, and set up a meeting right after that conversation.”
Be Ready for Anything
Suggest a casual meeting over drinks, Hattie says. But most importantly, be ready for wherever the night takes you.
"Leave open the possibility that you'll have a Valentine's Day love making session [and] be sex-ready anytime you’re going on a date,” she says. “Have condoms, have lubricant. Don't do anything without those two things.”
But Don’t Be Afraid to Say “No”...
“In the event you're feeling, ‘I don't want to move forward with this.’ You have to say to the guy, ‘I know this isn't really how I've come on,’ but be kind and say, ‘We both wanted it to happen, but it isn't,’” she explained.
...And Don't Take Rejection Personally
"If a guy isn't into you, don't get hurt," she said.
Hattie said rejection is something she has had her fair share of — especially when she’s dating men in their 40s or 50s who may have had another picture of a mature woman in mind.
“If somebody tells me ‘You’re too old for me,’ I say, ‘Tell me something I don’t know,’” she laughed.
Make the Experience About Yourself
“It's up to you to choose the one you want or not want, and then release them or take them in, and then you come up with the fullness of the experiences as it was for you,” Hattie says, emphasizing, “don't do anything you don't want to do and do whatever you want to do."
And instead of putting too much pressure on whether he’s Mr. or Mrs. Right, focus on how you feel about the encounter in the moment.
“You use dating and sexuality to get closer to yourself,” she says. “It doesn't matter if it's a good date or bad date, or he'll be with you forever or not forever. It's a wonderful opportunity. And you make it an adventure.”
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